harryzx-12
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Posts: 3643
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posted March 10, 2002 04:35 PM
Cop Joke
Bob was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge after spending a great
>day on the ocean fishing. He was late
>getting home and was speeding and wouldn't you know, a cop jumped out,
>radar gun in hand, motioned him to
>the side of the bridge. Bob pulled over like a good citizen. The cop
>walked up to the window and said, "You know
>how fast you were going, BOY?" Bob thought for a second and said, "Uhh,
>60?" "67 miles and hour, son! 67 mph
>in a 55 zone!" said the cop. "But if you already knew, officer," replied
>Bob, "why did you ask me?" Fuming over
>Bob's answer, the officer growled, in his sarcastic fashion, "That's
>speeding, and you're getting a ticket and a
>fine!" The cop took a closer look at Bob, in his stained fishing attire
>and said, "You don't even look like you have
>a job! Why, I've never seen anyone so scruffy in my entire life!" Bob
>answered, "I've got a jo! b! I have a good
>well-paying job!" The cop leaned in the window, smelling Bob's fish
>catch, said, "What kind of a job would a bum
>like you have?" "I'm a rectum stretcher!" replied Bob. "What you say
>BOY?" asked the patrolman. "I'm a rectum
>stretcher!" The cop, scratching his head, asked, "What does a rectum
>stretcher do?" Bob explained, "People call
>me up and say they need to be stretched, so I go over to their house. I
>start with a couple of fingers, then a
>couple more, and then one whole hand, then two. Then I slowly pull them
>farther and farther apart until it's a full
>six feet across." The cop, absorbed with these bizarre images in his
>mind, asked, "What the hell do you do with a
>six-foot asshole?" Bob nonchalantly answered, "You give it a radar gun
>and stick it at the end of a bridge."
You know what they say if ya can't take a joke??......Fuck ya!
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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways- Body thoroughly used up, totally worn out...Screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride !!!"
  
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22348bCVC
Zone Head
Posts: 798
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posted March 10, 2002 06:36 PM
Bahahahaha!!!!!
LMFAO!!!....GOOD ONE, HARRY!  ...I goota tell it to the boys in traffic unit and hope I make it out unscathed!
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...just relax...my dog wants to use only one of your legs...
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ROCKET J
Zone Head
Goes to water over a dummy!!!
Posts: 602
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posted March 10, 2002 06:36 PM
 Edited By: ROCKET J on 11 Mar 2002 13:24
Why you anti-establishment, A.C.L.U. loving, commie pinko fag!
How can you make jokes about the police? You have no idea what their day is like. I am not a cop, but I wish I was. I would bust your head. I am with the police all the way. The law is the fucking law. The police are ALWAYS right. Speeding is dangerous. Speeders should be shot. I never speed.
You can't outrun radar. It catches every speeder, every time.
Rocket
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If I get any smarter, my head will explode!
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JoshDunn
Expert Class
Posts: 373
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posted March 10, 2002 07:50 PM
Uh OH! I see something about to start here...
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Yosh Tri-Oval, PCIIIUSB Tuned by Nels
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Ninjaman12R
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as a Deal's Gap tour guide.
Posts: 4767
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posted March 11, 2002 05:10 AM
Nice try Rocket...
Good attempt at fishing but Harry will never take the bait. He'll still probably tell you to fuck off and die  . But it will be in a nice jokingly fashion. 
Harry??? Any comments...............?
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What we're dealin' with here is a complete lack of respect for the law.
Sheriff Buford T. Justice of TEXAS
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harryzx-12
Needs a job
Posts: 3643
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posted March 11, 2002 05:26 AM
Hey Rocket -How bout you get a real good running start and go take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut! Glad you liked it CVC.
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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways- Body thoroughly used up, totally worn out...Screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride !!!"
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Ninjaman12R
Needs a job
as a Deal's Gap tour guide.
Posts: 4767
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posted March 11, 2002 05:31 AM
Good Ol' Harry....
That MF never lets me down.........
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What we're dealin' with here is a complete lack of respect for the law.
Sheriff Buford T. Justice of TEXAS
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EastBayDave
Needs a job
Posts: 2245
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posted March 11, 2002 07:02 AM
just to be a nit-picking anus , it's 50mph limit on the GG bridge, & there's no place to pull over without getting hit... There's also cameras & CHP wall-to-wall. You can NOT speed on the GG without getting a ticket... (at least since 9/11)...
Great joke Harry...nice to see some can laugh at themselves...
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Enjoy the ride!
02' ZRX1200
00' ZX12R sold
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Tearinitup
Expert Class
VP Code Monkey
Posts: 298
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posted March 11, 2002 08:00 AM
Thanks dave. Im sure that we were all wondering that!
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12RPilot
Pro
Posts: 1094
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posted March 11, 2002 10:18 AM
Hey EBD...
Do they still charge to cross it? I remember when I lived there they had paid the thing off and everyone was bitching cuz they didn't plan to tear down the toll booths.
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If you aren't an AMA member, you're part of the problem.
NESBA #209
http://www.bikepics.com/members/12rpilot/04zx10r/
 
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harryzx-12
Needs a job
Posts: 3643
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posted March 11, 2002 10:39 AM
If all I knew about the golden gate bridge
Was turned into gasoline.It wouldn't be enough to power a piss ants motorcycle around a BB!
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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways- Body thoroughly used up, totally worn out...Screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride !!!"
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kcadby
Pro
Posts: 1733
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posted March 11, 2002 10:51 AM
Jax news the other night...
St. AUGUSTINE has a "gun-ho" (pun intended) HARLEY COP that has written OVER 3,000 tickets since he started "working" there!!!
Since there has only been ONE traffic fatality since he started there...ON HIS DAY OFF...He acted like HE is SINGLE HANDED responsible for saving EVERYONES life in the whole freakin city...
MAN was HE "FULL of HIMSELF"
So...do NOT speed in St. Augustine either!!!
Good Joke Harry (as usual) 
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EastBayDave
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Posts: 2245
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posted March 11, 2002 11:29 AM
quote:
Do they still charge to cross it? I remember when I lived there they had paid the thing off and everyone was bitching cuz they didn't plan to tear down the toll booths.
Not only do they (GGBD "Golden Gate Bridge District" Nazi's) still charge, it's gone from $2, to 3, to now $5.00 to cross! Not only that, but even when the rest of the (CalTrans) Bay bridges went to "free" for motorcycles during commute hours (using car pool lanes), GGBD INSIST's on charging motorcycles as much as cars, & make them wait in line too. Thereby delaying EVERYONE by making motorcycles wait, stop & dig for money, etc.
Even when a local petition started (Sponsored by "Citybike" magazine http://www.citybike.com) the CAR drivers were for free motorcycle crossings, to end delays. The GGBD wouldn't hear of it, & then made themselves look stupid finding idiotic ways of justifying it ("everyone must pay" & other stupid excuses.) Nothing we can do with the monopoly they have I guess.... Encourages me to take detours around the bridge when possible.
Shame.... 
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Enjoy the ride!
02' ZRX1200
00' ZX12R sold
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22348bCVC
Zone Head
Posts: 798
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posted March 11, 2002 11:44 AM
...I'm ok...for now...
quote:
LMFAO!!!....GOOD ONE, HARRY! ...I goota tell it to the boys in traffic unit and hope I make it out unscathed!
...Harry...I showed the joke to a traffic guru (the tag we give to the guys in the unit) last night...even HE said that he could laugh at THAT one...I actually saw a little sideways grin from his mouth!...and those guys NEVER smile!...I had my trigger finger on my O.C. spray, though...just in case...
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...just relax...my dog wants to use only one of your legs...
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ROCKET J
Zone Head
Goes to water over a dummy!!!
Posts: 602
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posted March 11, 2002 09:32 PM
Edited By: ROCKET J on 11 Mar 2002 21:32
Don't hold back...
quote:
Hey Rocket -How bout you get a real good running start and go take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut!
So just what are you trying to say Harry?
Rocket
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harryzx-12
Needs a job
Posts: 3643
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posted March 12, 2002 06:03 AM
So you want the short version? Ok
Fuck Off! :Finger:
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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways- Body thoroughly used up, totally worn out...Screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride !!!"
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ROCKET J
Zone Head
Goes to water over a dummy!!!
Posts: 602
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posted March 12, 2002 07:08 AM
You do love the police, don't you?
You're not one of those "speeders" are you?
Rocket
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harryzx-12
Needs a job
Posts: 3643
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posted March 12, 2002 08:08 AM
Uhhhhh
Yea!!
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"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways- Body thoroughly used up, totally worn out...Screaming "WOO HOO, What a Ride !!!"
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